Shouts and Hellos to PLAYBOY

PLAYBOY. What the hell is on your mind if you heard that word? Let me guess, in the middle of the hot riotous situation overwhelm media headlines yelling loudly from every corner around you-- newspaper, radio, TV news, infotainment, talk show and even as a pick up line to start a conversation to a girl who sit next to you on the bus—the first thing on your mind would be a hot and sweat-able magazine that offers you *especially you guys who have testosterones and still normally adore sexy chick instead of French kissing Brad Pitt* undressed hot sexy babe posed sensually with her protruding lips to make her lips looked fuller and sharp seeing eyes full of lust watching you straight ahead as if she was trying to tell you that she’s ready to “eat” you unmercifully until you knocked out by your own dirty and wild fantasy.

Well, when the rumors blew in the air said that Playboy is going to be published in Indonesia (and now it’s already well done!)-- without saying whether I was pro or contra either to Front Pembela Islam and other parties who tried to banned the realization because of pornography as the main reason or even the parties who sincerely agreed the publishing with their mind set concept of ‘art sake’ and entertainment *No, I don’t want to talk about that, let yourselves figure out on which party I stand*–- the single thing on my mind was my condolence from my deepest heart as a human who was born with a female gender. Until now on, my condolence still sadly adhered on me involving my self interpretation on seeing the insanity of this world.
It might be sounds cliché or worse of it, it might be sounds exaggerating. But here on my blog, I’d like to say this subjectively with my personal thought cause I surely do sure that you guys have your own opinion on this since everything in the world turned to be something that we couldn’t afford to see objectively *if it does, of course there will be no war, controversy and pro-contra!*.

PLAYBOY. Okay, what’s wrong with that? Well, I don’t mean to be a provocateur or an innocent kid who pretend to be innocent, but honestly this controversial and sensational magazine covered up with red color and Andhara Early posed --okay let me say: politely-- close up on it has made me really want to share my “shouts and hellos” to all of you guys who had involved yourself to this PLAYBOY, the most uproaring nowadays news topic, direct or indirect.

So dear everyone wherever you are, let me be pleased to say:

-Two thumbs up for Tiara Lestari, an Indonesian model who had became a controversial Playboy International version model cover and had realized her mistakes after she saw her beloved mother was terribly in sadness and disappointed knowing her nudity spread all over the world to satisfy male’s hormones. Now, she has reborn herself, promised to her mother to restart her life with her new commitment that she would make a reincarnation of her career- from a sensual to elegant model. Good for her, at least it proves that she is much more morally behave-- cause as she said, all her career success weren’t as worthy as her love to her mother--and of course, as a former sensual and sexy model, later on her beauty and wonderful body will be more “expensive” to be consumed. Realize it or not, she had helpfully helped herself raise her female gender value as a behavior woman. Salute!

- Deepest condolence to Andhara Early. Don’t you ever realize that your decision on being the first Indonesian Playboy cover model is not upgrading your popularity to be much better? That was too bad, dear. It just turned to be worse. Don’t know what was on your mind when you decided to accept that job, yes there is no nudity on that first edition magazine, but your latest sensational news about your baby (and whoever the father is) that had filled the infotainment spot is still freshly on our mind. So if you want to make a sensation to rise up your popularity, don’t be scared… Just behave, dear. Show your good attitude to be a better one.

- Assalamualaikum to Front Pembela Islam. Don’t want to say too much, but please, where have you been long time a go before Playboy release in Indonesia?! Don’t you ever SEE that there is a lot of cheap tabloid that expose -the wants to be famous- infamous woman with bikini offering her cheap body with cheap photography angle with naïve and uncomfortable to be read headlines standing impolitely in every single newspaper kiosks as far as you can see? Isn’t it contains pornography too? I surely believe that you really know what kind of those cheap tabloids consumer are. Doesn’t it teach them lot of sins? If it does, no wonder that there was lot of sexual criminality happened by those cheap tabloid consumer class. Yes, pornography is one kind of sin, but would you mind if I ask you with honor that if you banned PLAYBOY, you have to banned those tabloids too. Thank you very much.

- Hello to everyone who thinks that pornography is an art. Well, as an artist *hey, I’m a fresh graduate from art and design faculty, I’m a designer, so it means I’m an artist! Ha-ha*, yes, photography is an art. Yes, that God has created His creatures with high value of art. Ladies with their beautiful body, and gentlemen with their masculine shape, oh yes indeed. But if those wonderful God’s art creation appears too much (in this case in photography), it turns to be a pornography rather than art. Why porn? Because it stimulates hormones on a bad way; turns you on so that it couldn’t be called as an art anymore. Art is something that should be appreciated with senses, not with dirty lust.

- Loud yell to all man with stupid and shallow way to release their testosterones. YOU BETTER DIG YOUR OWN CEMETERY FROM NOW ON BECAUSE YOU GUYS DON’T BELONG HERE!! Don’t you have another job besides thinking about your hormones parade??!! Good man doesn’t treat woman as his hormonal objects. Good man treats woman with respect, not lust and dirty fantasy.

- Slap to all ladies who sincerely share herself for free. Over and over again, female is always being male’s object. WAKE UP YOU BITCHES!! God as the best creator ever has created us, female, as a special and extraordinary gorgeous creature to be APPRECIATED with RESPECT. The more you appear yourself cheap, the more lust you done, the more insult and unrespectable thing you got. Think twice.

Someday...

Would you know my name if I saw you in heaven?
Would it be the same if I saw you in heaven?
I must be strong and carry on,
'Cause I know I don't belong here in heaven.

Would you hold my hand if I saw you in heaven?
Would you help me stand if I saw you in heaven?
I'll find my way through night and day,
'Cause I know I just can't stay here in heaven.

Time can bring you down, time can bend your knees.
Time can break your heart, have you begging please,begging please.
Beyond the door there's peace I'm sure,
And I know there'll be no more tears in heaven.

*Tears in Heaven by Eric Clapton and Will Jennings plays melodious in the air*

I was reminding myself about the death in a sudden. Beyond my obsolescence thought on an obscurity intersection of my present life, I woke my mind up and yelled to myself out loud: “THANK GOD, I’M STILL ALIVE!”
I smiled on a cynical smile and asked myself, “Am I really ready to die?” And yet was in a great damn anxious feeling and worried about this horrible question.
The only reason why I was asking my self about the death was… hey, we never know when will we going to die, and we never know how long we will be alive. Somehow, it was nothing but a muse—someday, I’ll be gone.

Well, the essential things to be prepared for the up coming day are a prepared soul, good deed charity provisions, and all kind of vertical relationship to the All Mighty includes other life matters. I still remember that I have some friends who passed away years a go. One passed away because of Leukemia when I was on the second grade of junior high school- a girl named Rani, the twin sister of my classmate Rina. She was been struggling to hold herself on, fighting Leukemia for almost 2 years. On her day, she was extremely on a compassional condition—and everybody was so hard to let her go, especially her twin sister who had accompanied her for so long.
The other one was my former high school friend named Anton who passed away when I was on the second grade—this one passed away on a really tragic way: suicide. I still remember his rebellion upon our teacher, until one day I heard the news that he was dropped out from school. Had no idea what made him determined himself to end up his life, several months later my entire school were terribly shocked knowing his unbelievable tragic way on ending his life.
Next was Fajar, my beloved first year high school classmate who passed away on a traffic accident several week before our national final exam. It was really such an unfortunate way for him; a clever boy with good school achievement has ended his life too soon. His dream was enter Geodesy Faculty of ITB, and as long as I know him, he is really a good boy. Always do Dhuha pray while the rest of students were blasting the school canteen on riot, never do cheating on every examinations, and seemed really well prepared on facing the final exam. I still remember that he had just told his crush about his feeling and being denied several week before, and we were joking warmly couple of hours before the accident.
The last was Sasa, my lovely friend from Art and Design Faculty who passed away about 3 years a go- when I was on the third year of college. She was really a lovable and adorable girl- I bet she would be graduated as the best student of 2001 if she was still ‘here’. She always got A mark on every subjects, and -if I’m not mistaken- she got GPA 4 out of 4 scales on her last semester. Somehow, maybe it was already been written, she had to face her story of life- passed away so young because of pleurisy.

*deep sigh*

Okay, let me take a deep breath first. Well, maybe the point is... One day, the day will come. It’s all been written on our life scenario. Thing we had to prepare is “the charity stock”, the vertical relationship with God. Death could come in a sudden, unexpectedly. Life is full of surprises, life and death is a big secret. As a human with such a limited capability and power, we never know what will happen tomorrow, even a second after now. *Damn, I’m frightened by my own!!!!*

Tears in heaven, the song by Eric Clapton and Will Jennings was still humming in a gentle and slow whisper on my radio…
…Would you know my name if I saw you in heaven? Would it be the same if I saw you in heaven?...

Will everybody be missing me if I’m gone to heaven? Am I worthy enough to be missed if I’m gone?

I asked my self, and I wonder…